Beckham hasn't even moved to Beverly Hills yet and we're already seeing his deliciousness all over the gossip world. It excites me. You know what else excites me. This picture. American girls are kinda like dogs when it comes to territory. If it wasn't looked at as being weird, I'm sure we'd start peeing on skirts, purses and men. This picture is obviously a message to Victoria. It's along the lines of, Sleep with one eye open Robo. We're A Comin.
I remember when I had to talk myself out of moving to Hollywood. I had convinced myself that it would be flattering and perfectly legal to sit outside of David Beckham's house. Waiting for him to come outside in nothing but a robe, exposing his cock and balls in all their glory. It is then, when I would sparatically wild out, jump out of my car and pretend to be some neighbor taking a morning stroll. I'd raise my hand slightly to give the illusion that I was waving. If he waved back or [even better] gave the head nod, I'd break out in obscene sexual movements and shout, Lemme be the new nanny!!"
Jeezes. I should write books with all this imagination. In the meantime, I'm going to prove my impeccable photoshop capabilities by planting my face on Victoria's body.