Paris Hilton once again has pleased me. As you can see from the video above, we've got a four year old already doing the Paris pose. Hot.
I don't know why everyone's freaking out. Honestly. "Ooo. Bad mom. She's only four and lets her daughter like Paris Hilton."
What's the worst that can happen? She grows up wanting nothing but acceptance from everyone she meets. She stops in front of every mirror to touch up her lipgloss [cause only hookers wear color], she'll touch her hair every five seconds to make sure it hasn't fallen out, she'll walk around with a constant I wish I were somewhere else grin, she'll try shit on in the middle of stores and spin in the mirror four times, she'll substitute starbucks for food, cigarettes for vitamins and alcohol for everything else.
So ... let me know when the bad stuff happens. Because I think that's pretty much how our world works now. LIES !!! You know I like to wake up and come up with nonsense.
Starbucks. Like a place with that name would even exist. We don't drink coffee in our parts. It's unhealthy. I don't eat meat, I don't eat dairy, I don't ... eat ... at all. It makes me feel bad. Everytime I put a fork up to my mouth, my tear ducts flood and I think of all the helpless people all over the world not eating. I usually spend my nights down at the homeless shelter and then over at the pier handing out all of my clothes. Because that's what America's about. Helping everybody out who doesn't wanna work. I don't mind it at all. Because that gives me a good heart. Working 80 plus hour pay periods to give money to the cunt who wants to fuck and watch Maury all day.
I also built an underground STD awareness pirate ship. We call it the Ship of Morality. It is then when I round up the youngins and tell them how drinking, smoking and fornicating will make God hate them and strike them dead with lightening in the next storm.
We've gotta start teaching our children that everybody is sensitive, when someone speaks never disagree or argue, opinions must be heard, but not too much. and if there's a camera present, you're fucked.
Tonight at 8pm.
Be there or die.